What is coincidence and what do we mean by it? Everything that is happening now is happening at the same time — co-incidence. That’s interesting to ponder, but not what we mean when we use the term. We use it when 2 or more seemingly unlikely things occur in our awareness at the same time, that we take notice of. We are struck by it. We wonder how they are related, what caused them. That cause might be valuable information. There may be safety issues at stake. There might be secrets or truths to be revealed. It might be a phenomenon of the brain.
When someone doesn’t want to investigate, the catch phrase is “It’s just a coincidence,” using the word to indicate they think the occurance is meaningless. They have beliefs and judgments they are relying on to make this determination.
You can also use this phrase and its indication of meaninglessness after rigorous research in which no causal relationship can be found. Not by those research methods and resources anyway.
But without rigorous, broad investigation, believing things are “just coincidences” is just as much an unproven belief, aka faith, as any religion or doctrine.
In secular Western culture, with the deeply ingrained belief in reductionist materialism (from post-positivism philosophy, developed from ancient Greek belief in fundamental indivisible building blocks of reality, aka “atoms”) the default use of coincidence is meaninglessness, especially with regard to curious coincidences. Many people consider this view to be intellectually and morally superior and are eager to put down people who consider other possibilities. That’s dogma.
In Western Christian culture, there is often the opposite response to coincidences as being God’s Divine work, whether we understand the reason or not. Some people are humbled by this, some are pious about it.
In other cultures, religions or doctrines, such as Buddhism or Jungian psychology, all coincidences can have meaning and be interpreted.
One such view is that occurrences arise in relationship with each other. Reality is fundamentally relational. This belief gives life a very different quality and perspective that profoundly affects our behaviors, and our egos. It’s more than the linear physical cause and effect. Someone might ask, “Which came first, the student or the teacher?” That is a linear and reductionist way to phrase the question. A Buddhist way of looking at it is that they arise together — one cannot be without the other. The student creates the teacher and the teacher creates the student. Then you can ask another question: is this the relationship we want to co-create?
Here’s another question: What else is relating and arising with us beyond mundane human thought and awareness? When we de-center ourselves in the vastness of existence? What other lives and intelligences are here that are making themselves noticeable when we choose to open our curiosity, beliefs, and investigation? This is where more-than-human influences can be engaged with. Coincidence can point to a richness of subconscious and more than human relationships. This applies as much to ecology as to spirituality. It can help break us out of habitual biases and blind spots.
When looking at what happens in your own life, what you witness around you, you will notice patterns and curiosities, mysteries and epiphanies. Since everything is happening at once and is related and connected in countless ways, how do we tell which coincidences to investigate for meaning to ourselves, our community, or the larger world?
Our brains evolved to notice patterns; it’s how we are able to think so quickly. The brain can use a lot less data and energy to construct recognizable objects and events. We can watch this mechanism at work by seeing eyes and faces in objects that don’t have them, a phenomenon called peridillia. In some circumstances, such as being somewhere very unfamiliar, the process of identification is slow enough to witness objects moving from being unrecognizable to recognizable enough to classify, such as “box” “chair” “house” “human” etc.
By looking at the patterns we notice, we can look inside how our minds work, and also the effects we have on the world and the effects the world have on us. We can identify how we relate to everything.
We can sort coincidences by which need our attention and which don’t, or those we just can’t pay attention to for some reason. We sort for which might have significant utility and imperative for us now. We can quickly discard the familiar ongoing coincidences. There was a reason the coincidence caught your attention. Was it an artifact of how the brain works, or did you recognize something of value to you? Did you feel a sense of special relationship? Practice investigating and find out.
The caveat to all this is that it’s a busy highway to conspiracy theory land and confirmation bias. We need to use tools to keep us off those roads. This is literally why science was so intentionally developed. But science can’t answer all questions. So we do what we can and tread carefully. It’s part of why I advise to not believe anything too thoroughly, and to regularly do a belief system checkup.
And yes that means that the crazy ass stuff I write I have chosen to believe at the time and I may or may not believe it now. If you read enough of my posts you will see the changes. For instance, I had a phase of diving deep into the Divine Feminine and Mother Mary that I don’t relate to now. But it was useful to me at the time.
Happy hunting!